She taught me a LOT!
My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE.
³If you¹re going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning.²
My mother taught me RELIGION.
³You better pray that will come out of the carpet.²
My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
³If you don¹t straighten up, I¹m going to knock you into the middle of next week!²
My mother taught me LOGIC.
³Because I said so, that¹s why.²
My mother taught me MORE LOGIC.³If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you¹re not going to the store with me.²
My mother taught me FORESIGHT.
³Make sure you wear clean underwear in case you¹re in an accident.²
My mother taught me IRONY.
³Keep crying, and I¹ll give you something to cry about!²
My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.
³Shut your mouth and eat your supper.²
My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISTS.
³Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!²
My mother taught me about STAMINA.
³You¹ll sit there until all that spinach is gone.²
My mother taught me about WEATHER.
³This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it.²
My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.³If I told you once, I¹ve told you a million times, don¹t exaggerate!²
My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
³I brought you into this world, and I can take you out..²
My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION.
³Stop acting like your father!²
My mother taught me about ENVY.
³There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don¹t have wonderful parents like you do.²
My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION.
³Just wait until we get home.²
My mother taught me about RECEIVING.
³You are going to get it when you get home!²
My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.
³If you don¹t stop crossing your eyes, they are going to get stuck that way.²
My mother taught me ESP.
³Put your sweater on; don¹t you think I know when you are cold?²
My mother taught me HUMOR.³When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don¹t come running to me.²
My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT.
³If you don¹t eat your vegetables, you¹ll never grow up.²
My mother taught me GENETICS.
³You¹re just like your father.²
My mother taught me about my ROOTS.
³Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?²
My mother taught me WISDOM.
³When you get to be my age, you¹ll understand.²
My mother taught me about JUSTICE.³One day you¹ll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you!²